Blah, blah, blah
by Nero Shrimp
Summary: Spock/Kirk slash. Kirk fails the Kobayashi Maru for a second time and drags Bones out to a club to unwind.


Title: Blah, blah, blah (or Monkey See, Monkey Do)

Pairing: Spock/Kirk (Spirk)

Rating: T

Author's Note: Listen to Kesha's album 'Animal' and you will understand my vision of Kirk. Not OC. Songfic to "Blah, blah, blah." Lyrics after story.

* * *

Jim Kirk needed to let off some steam after failing the Kobayashi Maru test a second time. The drive to an off-base nightclub was refreshing in its own right, but Kirk longed for heavy base, electric melodies and flashing lights.

After turning over the keys of his beloved bike to a stranger, a rash move he regrets, Kirk purchased a soft-top convertible much like one he destroyed in the earlier days of his youth. Kirk enjoyed squinting through the wind and the rush of open air. Additionally, the convertible gave an excuse to crank the radio to full volume.

To his right was Leonard McCoy. They had become fast friends since entering the Academy. McCoy had taken more than a few swigs of whiskey from Kirk's flask to loosen him up for the drive. The high speed and hair-pin turns usually reminded the man of flying and so he avoided sitting as passenger when Kirk was behind the wheel. But tonight, with he liquor swimming through his veins, McCoy held tight to the frame of the windshield and stood in his seat egging the driver to go faster, turn harder. He punched a fist into the air and shouted into the desert.

Nervous for his drunken friend, Kirk grabbed at McCoy's belt loops and forced him down into the vintage vehicle. "Easy there, Bones. The night is young." He doubted McCoy was listening. His friend had thrown his head back and gulped down the air.

As they pulled into the lot and skidded to a stop, McCoy frowned. "Wasn't this a longer drive last time?" He looked around groggily to find that Kirk had already left the car and was headed toward the entrance.

"Bones!" Kirk called over his shoulder without slowing his pace. Nodding to the bouncer, the young cadet stepped into the dark dance hall.

Neon lights flashed over the dancing figures of the crowd. He paused a moment to drink in the atmosphere. The energy of the club sent a shiver down his spine and a wide smile crept over his face.

Making a bee line for the bar, Kirk dragged the stumbling doctor behind him. Kirk recognized few faces in the strobe lighting and so stopped short when his gaze fell on the ears an unnervingly familiar half-Vulcan.

"Pointy-eared, bastard," McCoy recognized the man immediately.

Kirk fumed. He wanted to escape, not be confronted with Academy bullshit. McCoy stumbled into Kirk, pulling his attention away from the young instructor.

"Whas wrong with yer face?" McCoy's speech slurred as he wavered on unsteady legs. He gestured to Kirk's furrowed brown and stern line of mouth. "So serious."

"Bones," Kirk dismissed his friend's drunken concern and pushed his hands away from his face. But the light shove was too much for McCoy. Thrown off balance, the doctor fell backward into dancing patrons. A butterfly effect took over the crowd and sent a ripple of stumbling ravers crashing into one another.

The carefree dancers caught their step again with ease, but the minor disturbance did not pass unnoticed by Spock. He looked up and watched Kirk and McCoy with a steady gaze. He watched as Kirk assisted McCoy to the bar for a seat. Kirk leaned into his friend's ear, "I thought you were supposed to take care of me, doc. I'm no good at this mothering business."

McCoy groaned in agreement and moved to rest his head on the bar's cool surface.

A calm voice came from across the bar. "Your friend is inebriated."

Kirk made a face, turned in the direction of the voice and grumbled, "Thank you, Captain Obvious."

Spock gave his head a nearly imperceptible tilt. "Commander. My rank is not Captain. You may address me as Commander, Cadet."

"I know who you are, Spock." Kirk rolled his eyes and waved over the bartender. "Jack, straight."

From his place, sprawled on the counter, McCoy scoffed.

Kirk looked up to see that Spock had briefly lifted an eyebrow in their direction. "See something you like?" Kirk knocked back his drink and ordered a double to follow.

"You are the cadet who, if I am using your term correctly, flipped a shit after the Kobayashi Maru this afternoon. Again." Spock continued, "Kirk, James T. You did not take failure honorably."

Kirk nodded, unimpressed. "Would you mind?" He pointed toward the speakers above them. "I came here for the music." Finishing off his second drink, the cadet moved to the dance floor with a strut. To his surprise, Spock followed.

Spock stood stiffly among the writhing bodies of the crowd as Kirk swayed with the music. Kirk spun around so his back faced the man. Closing his eyes, he felt the familiar energy of the crowd and bounced rhythmically. Lost in the beat, Kirk threw his arms over his head and gyrated with the others.

He felt Spock's hot breath on his neck, "There is not music of this kind where I am from." Spock spoke coolly over the noise of the club. "On Vulcan, this behavior would be deemed most inappropriate."

Kirk shook his head as if to rid himself of the Commander's incessant babble. But Spock was close behind him and leaned into Kirk as he spoke. Spock watched the cadet twist and manipulate his body. He was graceful though erratic. As his eyes followed the lines and curves of Kirk's body, Spock felt as though his clothing was uncomfortably tightening around him. He pulled at his collar, though the action did little to relieve his discomfort.

Spock's eyes fell to the movement of Kirk's hips; he reached out to touch them. His hand grazed Kirk's clothing before retracting immediately as if burned. Not perceiving any notice or objection from the cadet, Spock ventured to touch him again. Stepping closer, he let his hand rest on the small of Kirk's back.

Spinning out of Spock's touch, Kirk turned to face the instructor. "I knew you were watching." With hooded eyes, Kirk bit his lip contemplating.

With a smirk, Kirk closed the space between them and rolled his hips against Spock. The half-Vulcan gasped but quickly regained composure. "Would you not find it prudent to check on your friend at this time?" he attempted to redirect Kirk's focus.

Kirk glanced at the bar and observed McCoy vomiting into an oblivious woman's hand bag. "He's good," Kirk commented curtly.

Spock had an unreadable look on his face, "You have little concern for your companion?"

Kirk sighed, "My thoughts are engaged elsewhere." He ran his hands over Spock's lithe frame. Spock was solid and warm, begging to be touched.

Spock began to sway to the music, albeit awkwardly.

"There you go, Hot Stuff. Put a little wiggle in it," Kirk laughed into the Commander's shoulder, enjoying his effort.

Spock excused himself, overcome with a mix of human emotion: arousal, embarrassment, confusion, lust. "Is it not customary to hold a conversation before commencing in intimate dance?"

"No Spock," Kirk chuckled. "Sometimes we just dance." He coerced Spock's hips into a gentle rhythm against his.

"Cadet Kirk-" His breath hitched in his throat.

"Jim," the cadet insisted.

"Jim, yes. Might I inquire to what the T stands for?"

"Hmm?" Kirk continued dancing against his partner.

"The initial in your name: Kirk, James T."

Kirk closed his eyes and rocked into Spock's embrace. "Tiberius," he mumbled into the nape of Spock's neck.

"Tiberius," Spock repeated.

"Spock." Kirk placed a finger to the Commander's lips. "We are not having this conversation. We're dancing."

"Yes, however-"

"No," Kirk put his foot down. "No talking." He looked into Spock's clear brown eyes. What reflected back in them caught Kirk off-guard. There was so much humanity and vulnerability in those eyes. Kirk blinked to break the gaze. "I need a drink."

Spock felt a twinge in his chest as Kirk broke their rhythm. "Allow me."

Smiling sweetly, Kirk hummed consent, "Jack Daniels."

Spock raised an eyebrow, "Straight?"

Stifling a giggle, Kirk pointed toward a far corner of the club. "Meet me." The cadet made his way through the crowd and disappeared from Spock's view.

Spock searched for Kirk briefly before the blonde reappeared in the dim blue light of the dance floor. Kirk caught his eyes and smiled. Certain the cadet was awaiting his company; Spock took quick strides to the bar and returned to Kirk's side with an entire bottle of whiskey.

Kirk's eyes lit up, "Why, Mr. Spock, I do believe you are trying to seduce me."

Spock unscrewed the cap of the bottle and passed it to the cadet. "I believe the phrase I am looking for is 'monkey see, monkey do.'"

* * *

Coming out your mouth with your "Blah, blah, blah"  
Just zip your lips like a padlock

And meet me in the back with the Jack at the jukebox

I don't really care where you live at

Just turn around boy and let me hit that  
Don't be a little bitch with your chit chat

Just show me where your dick's at

Music's up, listen, Hot Stuff  
I'm in love with this song  
So just hush, Baby, shut up  
Heard enough

Stop talk talk talking that

Blah, blah, blah

Think you'll be getting this

Nah, nah, nah  
Not in the back of my car car car  
If you keep talking that blah, blah, blah, blah, blah

Boy come on now get my rocks off  
Come put a little love in my glove box  
Wanna dance with no pants on

Meet me in the back with the Jack at the jukebox

Just cut to the chase kid

Cause I know you don't care what my middle name is  
I wanna be naked

But you're wasted

Music's up, listen, Hot Stuff  
I'm in love with this song  
So just hush, Baby, shut up  
Heard enough

Stop talk talk talking that  
Blah, blah, blah  
Think you'll be gettin this  
Nah, nah, nah  
Not in the back of my car car car  
If you keep talking that blah, blah, blah, blah, blah

"Blah, blah, blah"

Kesha Rose  
-----------------------------

Please review.

Also, I am looking for a slash-friendly BETA.

:o)


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